


I Like Big Balls!

by cdelbridge



Category: Sherlock (TV), johnlock - Fandom
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-10
Updated: 2021-03-10
Packaged: 2021-03-16 16:54:37
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 493
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29953023
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cdelbridge/pseuds/cdelbridge
Summary: Sherlock is singing.  Apologies to Sir Mix-A-Lot, MC Hammer, Toni Basil and god knows who else.
Relationships: Johnlock
Comments: 4
Kudos: 25





	I Like Big Balls!

“I like big balls and I can’t deny..,” our favorite consulting detective was cooking dinner which may seem odd but was not the oddest thing happening at 221B. “Well use me, use me, I’m not the average groupie.” He gyrated across the kitchen to the refrigerator, pelvis thrusting as he went. “So tell ‘em to shake it. Shake it. Shake those sweaty balls. My baby got some balls.”

Sherlock danced his way back to the cooktop where he added wine to his sauce, poured himself a healthy portion and changed songs. “My my my my, can’t touch this.” He did an improvised shuffle-step thing and continued, “I told you homeboy, you can’t touch this.” More shuffling. “Yo sound the bell! Schools in sucker!” More shuffling. Grabbing a spoon, he tasted his sauce. Not bad! Just needed a little... Sherlock stood in front of their spice section, thinking. “Basil!”

The basil inspired another song change, “oh John you’re so fine, you’re so fine will you blow my dick, hey John!” He seasoned the sauce a little then added some more just to be safe. “Hey John!”

Moving away from the sauce with wine glass in hand, our consulting detective began to set the table. Still gyrating, and singing, he began to play air guitar as he sang, “back in black, I hit the sack, I’ve been too long gone I’m glad to be back.”

Looking happily around the flat, he decided everything was perfect. Moving back to the kitchen, he was just about to start dishing out food when the song he most couldn’t resist came on! “It’s astounding, time is fleeting, madness takes its toll. But listen closely, not for very much longer!” Needless to say, the food prep came to a halt! “I remember, doing the time warp. Drinking those moments when the blackness would hit me.” Sherlock moved away from anything he could knock over. “Let’s do the time warp again! Let’s do the time warp again. It’s just a jump to the left.” Our boy leaped lightly to the left, still singing. “And a step to the right! With your hands on your hips bring your knees in tight.” Needless to say, Sherlock was perfectly in step with the words. “But it’s the pelvic thrust that really drives you insane!”

Sherlock was so busy dancing, that he was unaware of company. That is until there was a short, beloved body behind him, holding onto his hips and singing along, “but it’s the pelvic thrust, that really drives you insane.” They continued in sync, “let’s do the time warp again! Let’s do the time warp again!”

Reaching for the pause button, John said, “dinner isn’t about to burn or anything is it?”

Sherlock did an eyeroll and said, “I can control myself even if you did make that cd of music for me to cook by.”

”Let me go back to the beginning of this song then. I missed some dancing.”


End file.
